D- I feel like all I am is a waste of your time whenever I'm around you. Like if you're nearby and I'm not working on something I'm automatically doing something wrong. You've never once told me you were proud of me. All I ever hear from you anymore are things like "You know nothing" and "Use some common sense". Everytime I'm around you I feel incompetent and I'm sick of it. I'm genuinely more happy when you are ignoring me and praising the others. I'm done trying to win your approval.
P- You seemed nice at first if not a little bit bitchy but I wrote it off as some character quirk of yours. Everyone who had known you better than I had told me to be wary and that you weren't someone to be trusted but I dismissed that as well preferring to find out on my own. We talked and confided in each other and things were ok for the most part, then when I make 1 mistake (granted it was a rather large one) you were gone for months, then when I happen to show up to your event while supporting my friends it's all smiles again. Since then we don't seem to talk at all.
To me it feels like you're just a fairweather friend who only deems me worth talking to if it furthers her own interests in the end. I'm pissed that it took me so long to realize it, I'm just too trusting i guess. Whatever, I'm done with you and your favors, go find someone else to manipulate.
C- If I could only rewind the last year and a half or so back there are so many things I would have done differently. I'm glad I at least got to meet and get to know you a little bit before I screwed everything up. You are a smart, conscientious, and beautiful young woman and deserve someone better than an idiot like me.
I- Thing's just never seem to fall in place at the right time do they? You are probably the one person who knows the most about the real me. I am amazed that after all the things I've told you, the good and the bad, that you've still accepted me, faults and all. I've always appreciated our conversations and your sage advice. I honestly don't know what I would have done without you to talk to these last several years. I find myself thinking about you more often than not these days, probably because you'll be leaving soon. If you do see this, know that i'll miss you terribly but I'll be praying that you have fun, stay safe, and become extremely successful in the near future. Who knows maybe someday things will actually fall into place for the both of us?
